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Russ Parr Horrorscopes

Source: Reach Media / Reach Media

 

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It’s time for another reading of the “Daily Horrorscope,” where Georgia Alfredas keeps it real by telling every astrological sign the harsh truth about themselves for today’s date of September 20th, 2022.

 

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Aries: You think your new man is sexy because he’s a fugitive.

Taurus: You had no idea how someone’s lie turned you off?

Gemini. Your daughter just brought home the man of her dreams who turns out to be the man of your nightmares.

Cancer: You just lost 15 pounds. Why are you quitting your high-paying job to become a high fashion model?

Leo: It is not a good idea to try and order Italian dishes at dinner that you cannot pronounce for your new girl.

Virgo: You came to work late every day. Yet you expect to raise. Your boss is scared of you. So your expectations are actually warranted.

Libra: If you won’t break up with a person because they owe you money, That’s understandable.

Scorpio: Don’t let your teenage daughter get away with texting while you’re fussing.

Sagittarius: You think the NBA is falling off because there’s just not one cute player.

Capricorn: Your NBA team may not be well run if the public address announcer at NBA games has problems with the basic sentence structuring and conjugating verbs.

Aquarius: Russell Westbrook is wearing a prettier blouse than you. Re-examine your fashion.

Pisces: You liked your new boyfriend’s creative choices and the outfits that he wears. It’s cool. Until he came to pick you up looking like Django.

 

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