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Aryn Drake-Lee, the estranged wife of “Grey’s Anatomy” star Jesse Williams says their break-up was “a blessing in disguise,” and now she’s a mother on a mission as the former couple battle it out over child custody, two years after Williams filed for divorce.

Drake-Lee is spilling as much tea as she legally can on her new podcast called BBSARETRASH (Babies Are Trash), which she launched with fellow mom/friend Trian Long-Smith.

“It’s a very different lane for both of us to come out and share our voices, and show our faces this way. Our tagline is, ‘Two liberated mamas smashing the patriarchy one candid conversation around healing through mothering at a time.’”

Opening up for the first time to PEOPLE, she says the show aims to help and inspire moms who are facing similar marital and post-martial challenges.

“I think a lot of women are still in the place where we’re pretending like we can do everything. And it’s not realistic, and it’s not holistic, and it’s not sustainable,” says Drake-Lee. “I want to empower women to find their voice, to take the mask off so that they can really find the connection and the community that they’re seeking.”

And in case you’re wondering what’s up with the show’s name: “It’s tongue in cheek in that when you are in the hard moments, that’s when you learn and that’s when you grow. We’re not over here trying to pretend like everything is cool and cookies and rainbows. That’s not at all what time it is.”

Drake-Lee says it has taken a lot of soul-searching to reach the positive place she is now, following her split with Williams.


“When the divorce process started I had two nursing babies, and I am the one that ran our household for the 14 and a half years that he and I were together in the same house. And for our children, and for the creation of the businesses that we built together when I left my career in New York for us to move to California to pursue his, and then as a result built it…I knew, as the one that was really holding it all together, that I didn’t have a lot of room to fall, even though I was falling.”

She adds, “I was in a place where I needed the support that was going to help to ground me. Most everybody I had spent the eight years here in LA with all went with him,” she reveals.

“It was a blessing in disguise because it was a real slap in the face to see who was around us and why, and at that point it became very clear. And it cleared a pathway for me to make a shift and get back onto a path that was more in alignment with how I wanted to live my life,” says Drake-Lee in her PEOPLE exclusive.


“Hollywood and I bump heads. It was never my value system, and it was never something that I was striving for,” she says. “It never felt comfortable for me because of how superficial it was. And then that all became abundantly clear when everybody went left.”

As for the many rumors and speculation about her marriage, “Much of what they say is wrong,” she says. “But I’m not interested in a tit-for-tat, because that’s just never ending. People believe what they want to believe because it’s easy.”

Drake-Lee and Long-Smith’s new podcast is available on Spotify, Anchor and

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