“A” convinced herself that if she walked on the sunny side long enough the feelings would disappear. She noticed herself become angrier and sadder, the opposite effect of what the positivity pill was supposed to do. Together we sat in the uncomfortable, this place that was not sunny or happy or positive. We faced her fears, self-doubt, provided space for anger and sadness. “A” realized it was not the fear or sadness itself that was the problem, but it was all in how she dealt with them.
To deal with them, she had to acknowledge their presence. The more she was able to identify her feelings and provide the care needed, her negative thoughts and feelings became less powerful; she was able to find her sugar and water. She stopped drinking lemon juice and found the recipe for lemonade.
Emotions and feelings are not the enemy. Our desire to only live in the comfortable and denial of uncomfortable feelings as real, honoring the truth they hold is.
Stacey Younge, LCSW is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and owner of Sixth Street Wellness. Her private practice focuses on utilizing both traditional therapy and telebehavioral health specializing in depression, anxiety and trauma. She is also the Senior Youth Clinician at a community mental health center in Harlem, New York specializing in adolescents and justice-involved youth. Stacey is a California native, runner and mental health advocate who is here to help you.
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How Always Thinking Positive Might Actually Be Negative For You was originally published on hellobeautiful.com