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I don’t think there’s a sexually active woman alive who couldn’t relate on some level to the crazy story about the woman who shot her man over poor performance in bed. Even though 58-year-old Sadie Bell took things way too far when she resorted to violence, her frustration was all too real.

But let’s face it; there are no guarantees when it comes to sex and in a way, that’s what makes it so intriguing. Every time is different and thankfully most of us can look forward to more satisfaction than disappointment over all.

Shooting your partner isn’t the answer but neither is keeping it all inside. So what’s the answer? A report card, suggestion box, three strikes and you’re out rule? How can we keep the spontaneity and do more to ensure that there’s more equity.

I’ve given this a lot of thought and in a perfect world; sex would be run more like Starbuck’s.

Hear me out:

  1. It’s clean and always looks nice
  2. It offers not only a lots of variety, but variety that changes with the seasons
  3. You don’t have to know how to pronounce it to get it
  4. You can get it almost any time you want it

And the biggest reason that sex should operate more like Starbuck’s is the Barista’s Promise. Every Starbuck’s you walk into has this signage posted:

  1. “Love your beverage or let us know. We’ll always make it right. “ Bam!

Think of how much better our relationships would be if each of us cared enough to want to go the extra mile… to take the extra step.

None of us can promise perfection in any areas of our lives. But when we do something wrong and it’s brought to our attention, we all can make a serious effort to make it right.

But it’s a two-way street.

How many times do we just accept things that go wrong without even letting the other person know we aren’t happy or satisfied? I know women who expect their partners to be mind readers. They complain to their sisters, their friends, their doctors, but never sit down and tell their man what he can do to make them happy.

And that isn’t fair.

Think about this next time you’re sipping on your tall Double Chocolate Chip Frappuccino, literally or figuratively. Not just in bed but when he buys you a sweater, or cooks your breakfast, let him know that you appreciate his thoughtfulness.

And I can hear the guys out there now, “what about me, what about when I’m not satisfied. I hear you. We women should make it easy and comfortable for our men to let us know what isn’t working too.

Hot, cold, shaken, stirred – give each other a chance to do our best to always make it right.