Should I be submissive to my man? Not a chance! I’m an independent woman who doesn’t need a man to make me happy… Both of these statements are a bit cliche, but submission continues to be a topic amongst modern women. On the premiere episode of “Married To Medicine” season 2, we were introduced to Dr. Heavenly Kimes, a dentist who made it known that she likes to be submissive to her man because it is a man’s role to be in charge.

“Being married to Dr. Damon Christian Kimes is one of my greatest accomplishments, and I take pleasure in serving him,” Dr. Heavenly tells HelloBeautiful. “I am a very successful doctor, who happens to own multiple businesses, is an author, has a real estate license, etc., but I don’t carry over that ‘boss’ mentality into my household.”

Dr. Heavenly stood out amongst her new cast mates because of her beliefs. During a dinner scene on the Bravo reality show, Dr. Heavenly  confronted cast mate Dr. Jackie because she assumed Jackie was not as submissive to her own husband as she is to hers.

“Let me be perfectly clear, submission does not mean I’m his slave, actually in the Bible it means to ‘support,’” she says. “Certainly submission does not mean going against my morals. Submissiveness simply means being humble, and engaging in a positive dialogue with your husband. It means maintaining your own dignity, while helpfully cooperating with your husband in building the family.”

So does submissiveness equate to a successful relationship? According to Dr. Heavenly’s prescription book, it does.

The doctor is in…see her tips on how to maintain a successful relationship by being more submissive.

1.  Have a hot meal ready for your man when he gets home from work. Let’s face it, I’m a busy woman, and I don’t always have time to cook. But if I don’t think I’ll have the time that night, I’ll have my cook prepare something, or I will pick something up.

2. Don’t be a prude in the bedroom. Of course, I am not encouraging you to go out and have a threesome, BUT keep an open mind to the new things that your husband wants to try. Don’t be so quick to say “no.” Take pleasure in pleasing your man. And please try not to ever go to sleep angry.

3. Don’t be a nag. You don’t always have to have response. As women, we like to give our opinions, often times, unwarranted. It’s OK to not have a comment. Pick and choose your battles if it’s not that important…let it go!  Your husband does not want to hear your opinion 24/7, especially when using a loud, high-pitched tone (that some of us like to use).

4. Show him your appreciation. You can catch more bees with honey than you can with vinegar. Be kind, and polite to your husband, and he will reciprocate. Show him that you are thankful for all that he does. Make your words soft and sweet. You won’t be disappointed with the results you’ll get.

5. Follow his lead. You married your husband for a reason, right? Hopefully you trust him enough to make the important decisions in your household. Again, don’t go with things that are immoral, or wrong, but definitely always remember to make him feel like he wears the pants.

6. Your career does NOT come first. I have a super busy schedule, especially now that I am a cast member on Bravo’s “Married to Medicine.” However, when I get home from work, I turn my phone off. I am there to get my kids off the bus. Family time is very important to me. I cherish those moments.

7. Look sexy for him. It is so important to look good for your man. Know what your man likes, and what he thinks is attractive. I realized recently that this is MOST important! Try to keep yourself in shape and put together.

8. Let him know it’s OK for him to be stressed. Because he is the man and is expected to take on a lot of things and it can sometimes get stressful for him. Men aren’t always good at expressing themselves when they are stressed or depressed. Let him know that it’s OK to feel that way, and make yourself emotionally available.

9. Marry someone you genuinely admire and find east to respect. When you admire the man you chose to marry, it doesn’t feel like a chore when you’re accommodating him. It will be something you want to do. You’ll want to give him the respect he deserves.

10. Get a support system. Surround yourself with people who are like you, or people who support your lifestyle. There is nothing worse than a friend who doesn’t agree with your lifestyle trying to give you advice. There is nothing wrong with being a submissive wife, and your closest friends should be people who aren’t judging you for it!

Dr. Heavenly’s traditional views (or archaic, depending on who you ask) almost sound like satire, but does she have a point?

What say you readers? Do you agree with Dr. Heavenly?

Visit her website, here.

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9 thoughts on “10 Reasons You Should Be Submissive To Your Man, According To ‘Married To Medicine’ Star

  1. Linda on said:

    They can take her along with Toya off the show and maybe it’ll be better, anyway, on to the topic, there’s submissive but only if respect is involved, that’s hard to find.

  2. This new modern strategy is working really well. Families strong, legacies to pass on, great examples for the children. Why listen to her archaic ways??

  3. midwest on said:

    So the most important thing in the world is for women to be submissive, cause that’s what we’re placed on this planet for. BullSh@T! If we as a people would only learn to love,live & take care of ourselves this world would be a much better place.

  4. Clara on said:

    What is her husband doing for her? Its a woman’s job to please a man and it’s just a man’s job to be pleased? Where is the balance in a relationship like this. I don’t think any woman should burden themselves with this load.

  5. redbone1954 on said:

    If it works for her good but no man will come first in my life exept God then family (him and you should only follow a man who IS following God OK I don’t think I heard that in her 10 reasons. Good luck to her

  6. Minsky Brown, Uk on said:

    If it works for her and her husband then fine. She is obviously a capable smart woman, so its not that she prostrates herself, I understand her to mean, she allows her husband to be a man, whilst she is a woman in his presence.
    I like Dr Heavenly, I also thought she was quite correct to challenge Dr Jackie’s rude and demeaning behaviour to the courteous woman who approached them in the bowling alley.
    Her condescension at times is very irritating.
    – She should know, obesity is a factor but not the cause of cancers, otherwise she herself would not have had breast cancer?? – looking down on people who are not of her social class, just mean.
    I do hope her and Dr Simone become friends though, as they are probably the two nicest women on the show, and who actually know who they are, without performance or arrogance.

  7. Janice on said:

    I think the doctor has very valid points, and I agree with her. Perhaps if black women embraced this toned down approached to honoring men, then more of us would be more successful at finding a good man to marry. Let a man be the man to lead the family and support him in that effort. Let go of the power reigns, be a lady that can be a good wife. In the end, it’s win-win!

  8. Zenith on said:

    If this works for her And her marriage, that’s great. It is not necessary, however, for her to verbally assault other women who she thinks choose to live outside of her paradigm. She seems insecure and in need of validation for her choices.

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