This is Chris Paul from the TJMS running through the top stories in roughly sixty seconds with The Morning Minute.
Halleluiah! The NFL and the Referees’ Union have reached an agreement to end the strike. This means that the real refs may actually be on the field for the games this weekend. Also this means that the blind, cockeyed, confused, dumbfounded and pitiful replacement referees can go back to their old jobs of working on the Romney campaign.
Floyd Mayweather, Jr. and Manny Pacquiao have finally settled the defamation lawsuit, which was filed three years ago after Floyd accused Manny of using steroids, but there’s no word on how much money will be paid, which party was liable, or which one of the fighters will get custody of Rapper 50 Cent.
Out now is the list of America’s favorite salty snack foods; number one, Ritz Crackers; number two, Lay’s Potato Chips; and number three, Doritos. In fact Americans love salty snacks so much Monica Lewinsky is thinking about marketing her tell-all as a cookbook.
The Governor of California has just signed a bill that will allow self-driving cars on the highway. In other news the LAPD has just approved self ass whooping billy-clubs to beat the black off negroes in self-driving cars.
I’m Chris Paul and this was The Morning Minute.