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San Antonio, TX — It’s hard to believe that the decision for strippers to wear bikinis or pasties is real a court case, but apparently it is.

According to, a U.S. district court judge in San Antonio is ruling in case has named this particular case: “The Case of The Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Bikini Top versus the (More) Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Pastie.”

Due to claims of strip clubs causing poverty values to drop and attract crime, the City of San Antonio made a new ordinance requiring strippers to wear bikini tops.

In Judge Biery’s ruling he asks, “To bare or not to bare, that is the question,” and he encourages both parties in the case to “navigate the peaks and valleys of litigation, perhaps to reach a happy ending.”

This is a case that is important to anyone living near one of these clubs and to the profits of the club owners. In the end, bikinis won. But doesn’t that defeat the purpose of a “strip” club.

If you frequent strip clubs, San Antonio is definitely not the place to go. Check out Judge Biery’s entertaining order here.