It’s time for another reading of the “Daily Horrorscope,” where Georgia Alfredas keeps it real by telling every astrological sign the harsh truth about themselves for today’s date of June 23rd, 2022.
Aries: Why do you say all the things you have are worth more than they actually are?
Taurus: Sleeping at your desk on your second day on the job? That’s just not advisable.
Gemini: You just met the man of your dreams. Who also has habitual snorts that scare you?
Cancer: Your girlfriend hate that you’re always talking about working out.
Leo: Your son just got accepted at a major university. Yay. I mean, sure. He has the reading and writing skills of a fourth-grader but he can run a 3.9 40 so well yeah.
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Virgo: You are a commitment-phobe, but only with men that have no potential.
Libra: You know, you’re getting old when you’re new man picks you up in his Mama’s car and alright with it.
Scorpio: Just remember, there is no K in Walmart.
Sagittarius: Your dog is so hard-headed. He just doesn’t obey. He too dumb to take Petsmart
Capricorn: You know, you’ve watched every single movie on Netflix when you’re actually watching the floating screensaver pictures on your TV?
Aquarius: Remember ladies. It’s just not a sexy thing if a guy refuses to take his socks off while making love to you.
Pisces: If you’re a personal injury attorney, and you’ve had to actually hire yourself in more than four occasions. That’s not a good look.
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