When two individuals come together on a common ground to agree to make a union work, there will be differences of opinions about what is acceptable within a relationship. Each person brings their unique set of past experiences, baggage and preconceived notions about relationships to the table and this is why it is important to have these talks before moving forward in a relationship.
You wouldn’t sign a contract and agree to a deal before reading the fine print and negotiating portions of the agreement that may not be favorable to you, so why would you treat a romantic relationship any different? Taking the time to step outside of those feelings of joy and happiness to sincerely analyze the person you are about to take a leap of faith with isn’t going to lessen how you feel about that person. It will simply give you a realistic idea about if this person fits into your lifestyle.
Getting Started
Sometimes, we just want to fall in love and let everything develop into whatever it is supposed to be. However, when lines are not drawn into the sand and each person doesn’t have a clear understanding of what it is they are entering into, lines get crossed, assumptions are made and each person is led to believe the situation is something different from what is actually being lived in reality.
- Make a commitment to develop your “relationship contract” before deepening the bond of your next relationship.
- If you are currently in a relationship, it isn’t too late to have a discussion with your partner about your standards and expectations.
- The contract can simply be a spoken agreement with your partner, or you can take it a step further and draw up an actual contract on paper that each of you agree to sign and uphold for the duration of your relationship.
- It’s always a good idea to revisit the contract as time passes. Just as the seasons change, personal opinions and standards change and can have a negative effect on the relationship if those new changes aren’t worked into the union.
The possibilities are endless, but the decision is ultimately yours. It’s all about clear and effective communication to make your union the most awesome partnership that it can be!
Do You Need A “Relationship Contract”? was originally published on blackdoctor.org
