Now before everyone starts groaning, allow me to explain. There were two fascinating stories in the news this past week involving death that you may have heard about.

First, there was the man in Luxor, Egypt pronounced dead at the hospital after suffering a heart attack. Keeping with Islamic tradition, the family brought the body home from the hospital and began preparing it for the funeral, when the man suddenly woke up.

His mother fainted… then they all celebrated.

And in England, there is a tragic yet inspiring story emerging in book form (and soon to be made into a movie) about a now-deceased mother who, upon learning she was dying from cancer, decided to dictate a list of things she wanted to happen after she took her last breath.

The lengthy list included items for her husband and children to do like travel to the pyramids, swim in the Red Sea, and a bunch of other thrilling activities. The family has already accomplished a number of these tasks and is determined to do them all. Beautiful.

I bring both of these death experiences up today because, if you consider them together, they actually say a lot about life and our perspective on it.

On one side, you have a man who has been granted the ultimate second chance at life, a chance to live again, to love again, even to correct things he may not have gotten right previously; an amazing opportunity.

On the other hand, you have a woman knowing that her life will soon be over using her remaining days to ensure that her family will live their lives to the fullest after she’s gone.

You see, both stories–fascinating and poignant as they are in their own ways–are relevant to all of us in that they are actually not about death at all. They are about life, for all of its wonder and opportunity.

We sometimes get in a rut where we feel our lives are not going anywhere and our problems are consuming us. But it really comes down to how we choose to look at life.

And I did say choose because no matter what we’re going through we can choose to focus on the negative or the positive, one obvious example is that brother, J.R. Martinez, from Dancing with the Stars who was disfigured while serving in Iraq. Look at how he’s moved on with his life, enjoying every day, focusing on the positive, living his dream.

So we should recognize, just like the Egyptian man who came back to life, that we have the opportunity from this day forward to pursue the life we really want, to change ourselves, to impact our world.

And if we can lay out all of the things we truly wish to do, see and accomplish on this earth today, then we have a shot at actually enjoying them with our loved ones, an opportunity that the English mother didn’t fully get.

The real point being that we should not have to come face to face with death before we recognize how precious and valuable our lives truly are and once we recognize this value, we’ll have little time to focus on death since our days will be so full of living.

Or as the great American writer, Mark Twain, once said:

“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. One who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”

Until next time, this is Stephanie in love and hope.

Yet, the president of the United States has managed to serve up a concoction of all three by virtue of his recent pronouncement that he believes gay couples have a right to marry.

I’m not sure what political calculations transpired to lead both Vice President Biden and President Obama to issue their endorsements of one of the country’s most controversial propositions now – after all, the gay constituency is not exactly a swing vote — but you can bet there was some heavy duty adding and subtracting going on in the West Wing just days before they gave the thumbs up.

Previously, President Obama had said he approved only of civil unions between gay people. I would hate to think that, all along, he really supported gay marriage and held back that ultimate approval like a trump card, to be played with strategic timing and for effect. But, that’s politics for you; it’s all about what’s best for the politician, not necessarily for the masses.

On the other hand, Mr. Obama may have simply evolved. Graduated in his thinking.Progressed in his philosophy. Still, why now?

Whatever may have occurred in the White House war room, this much is for sure: They sho’ nuff started something. Especially in black houses of worship.

A good number of black ministers have denounced the president’s position, declaring it in conflict with the Bible, wherein God is said to condemn homosexual relations as an “abomination.”

It sometimes makes you wonder if some of the Christian clergy have read both parts of the Bible. The “abomination” passage comes from the Old Testament, the annals of Jewish law and prophecy aimed at getting people to behave so that the Messiah would come. Notably, the New Testament, which chronicles the life of Jesus Christ and the infancy of Christianity, makes no mention of such relationships and underscores God’s grace, mercy, forgiveness and accessibility to all.

No wonder that there are countless people who are conflicted over this matter – maybe because they have gay friends, co-workers or relatives; maybe because they are, themselves, secretly gay; maybe because they simply cannot make sense of despising or discriminating against someone who is only asking to be who he or she is.

Yet, some ministers – Atlanta’s Eddie Long and Bernice King prominent among them – exacerbate the conflict by preaching hellfire and brimstone, carrying on about the wrath of God, as if there aren’t a host of other things that might draw the Almighty’s ire.

I have no patience for that kind of ministerial guidance, which does nothing to enlighten the strivers, but only insists on their lemming-like consent.No need to open a mouth against a closed mind.

I would, however, like to hear them explain where there’s anything in the Good Book that tells me I should do unto others as I would hate for others to do unto me.