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Disgraced former Baltimore Ravens player Ray Rice is opening up about the aftermath surrounding his brutal assault against his then fiancée Janay. The three-time Pro Bowl running back spoke with the Baltimore Sun recently where he confessed when video of his attack on Janay was released to the public, he thought about killing himself.  It was one year ago, Rice and Janay were arrested after the two were engaged in a physical altercation. Days later TMZ obtained hotel surveillance footage where it showed Janay being knocked out cold by Rice in an elevator at the Revel Casino in Atlantic City, Nj, and then dragged out on the floor. Rice admited he felt “horrible” of the entire incident and debated on killing himself.

Rice remarked:

The big picture of it all, being the person that I am, I really felt horrible. You almost want to punish yourself. I know I’m never going to win the battle of public opinion. Honestly, I almost felt like at one point that it wasn’t worth living. I see why people commit suicide.

Rice was dropped from the Ravens and suspended indefinitely by the NFL last September. Just two months later, Rice won his appeal against the league and was reinstated. Rice is now a free agent and hoping a team will sign him. Rice also revealed his relationship with his wife is stronger than ever and knows while Janay may have given him another chance, he will have to work harder for the public’s trust (you think bruh?!) Rice stated:

It’s tough, I realize that’s a battle I’m going to have to face for the rest of my life. Time does heal everything, but I don’t think people are going to forget this. I want people to not forget about the incident, but I want people to see there’s a human being on the other side. This is not a monster, a guy who’s a repeat offender. I’m not the guy they stereotype me to be. I’m not excusing what I did.

Ok, how is there a “human side” to Rice beating the woman he promised to “love, honor and cherish”? We need the math on this to see how it adds up because clearly it doesn’t.

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Ray Rice Confesses To Having Suicidal Thoughts After The Elevator Attack Became Public  was originally published on hellobeautiful.com