American Idol alum, Grammy winner Mandisa took a bold step forward yesterday. She took to her blog post to reveal the sensitive, yet boldly honest explanation of her absence from the Grammy Awards. For many, the once in a lifetime event means getting dressed up and meeting your heroes. For Mandisa, this year, it meant sticking to your principles of being a Christian. Here is what she said. Read it all.
Do not allow this world to mold you in its own image. Instead, be transformed from the inside out by renewing your mind.” Romans 12:2a (Voice) At 4PM yesterday, I was not glammed up in a fancy gown, sitting in my seat at the Grammy Award Pre-Telecast, listening to the man reading the nominee list for Best Gospel/Contemporary Christian Music (CCM) Performance, Best CCM Song, and Best CCM Album. I was rockin’ some purple sweats, sitting in front of my computer, watching the live stream online. If you saw the video I posted yesterday, you heard my utter shock and immediate flood of tears, not to mention my phone blowing up when Overcomer was read as CCM Song and Album of the Year! I could not believe it! Since then, many have asked why I was not there to accept the award. Ok. Are you ready for my brutal honesty? I have several reasons: 1. Over the next 100 days, I’ll be home for about 20 of them. I’m taking every chance I get to enjoy my time here…and Rufus (my bed, yeah, I said it!) 2. I can’t tell you how little I enjoy people scrutinizing what I am wearing and how I look. I’ve been on the receiving end of such mean comments coming from the other side of the anonymity the world-wide web provides. I can usually handle it, but recent events have left me feeling insecure about such things these days (if you missed my Facebook post a couple of weeks ago, I explain more about that here: http://disa.cta.gs/03i) I wish I could tell you it doesn’t hurt my feelings. Honestly, it does. I’m still learning to believe the truth about me, remember? (http://disa.cta.gs/03j) 3. All of my previous albums (True Beauty - http://disa.cta.gs/03k, Freedom - http://disa.cta.gs/03l, and What If We Were Real - http://disa.cta.gs/03m) were nominated for the Grammy Album of the Year award. It really IS an honor just being nominated. And I really WAS honored to be nominated with Israel Houghton (2007 & 2009), and Chris Tomlin (2011), the winners of each of those years. Following that trend, I naturally assumed Chris Tomlin would win this year, too! I figured I would cheer Chris on from the comfort of my home! Finally, the fourth reason I chose not to attend this year: Yes, both times I have gone to the Grammys I have witnessed performances I wish I could erase from my memory, and yes, I fast forwarded through several performances this year; but my reason is not because of them, it’s because of me. I have been struggling with being in the world, not of it lately. I have fallen prey to the alluring pull of flesh, pride, and selfish desires quite a bit recently. “Don’t fall in love with this corrupt world or worship the things it can offer. Those who love its corrupt ways don’t have the Father’s love living within them. All the things the world can offer to you—the allure of pleasure, the passion to have things, and the pompous sense of superiority—do not come from the Father…” 1 John 2:15-16a (The Voice) I knew that submerging myself into an environment that celebrates those things was risky for me at this time. I am taking steps to renew my mind to become the Heavenly Father-centered, completely satisfied with Jesus, and Holy Spirit-led woman I felt I was a few months ago, but I’m feeling a bit like an infant learning to walk again on shaky legs.
Read rest of confession on next page!