He’s such an easy target.

Kanye West might as well have a sign on his back that says “provoke me and get paid.”

It can’t be easy being him. I’m not defending his actions, but every one knows he’s a young, rich, hot-headed male that TMZ and the tabloids love to hate.

The latest, as of this posting anyway, is his run in with a dude at the chiropractor’s office. As Kim Kardashian was entering the office, the guy holding the door for her allegedly used the N-word, referring to the paparazzi.  When she told him that word was inappropriate, he allegedly screamed at her “shut up, N -word lover, stupid slut.”

The story says Kanye arrived a short time later, ran up to the guy and punched him.

If this account is true, Kanye didn’t actually see or hear the encounter between Kim and the dude, which probably means Kim told him about it.

Here’s what I’d like Kim and other women, especially those with black men, to know. Black men need our love, our support, our help, and our loyalty.

Black men need us to have their back.

Yes, Kanye West puts his foot in his mouth and is fun to tease.  But like so many black men who are outspoken or confident, he has been labeled as arrogant or cocky. On stage or on the court, a certain type of swagger is expected and accepted by mainstream America.

What Kim may not know is according to blackstarproject.org, only 45 percent of black males graduate from high school in the United States, black men earn 67 percent of what white men make, and one out of every 21 black men can expect to be murdered.

Year after year, these horrific statistics are published and regurgitated by sociologists, reporters and talk show hosts.

If we don’t lift them up,  who will?

Black men need us to have their backs.

What they don’t need is for us to:

1.     Put them in harmful, dangerous or volatile situations.
2.     Make them feel like they have to prove that they love us.
3.     Make them feel they aren’t worthy of us
4.     Feed their insecurities.
5.      Ignore the pressures of being judged, profiled, and belittled.

In reality, it takes a strong woman to do these things. I think the only one who might have consistently done all five was Ruby Dee. And Ossie Davis isn’t here any longer to tell us any different.

But seriously, it takes a courageous woman to stand back to back with her man, able to be there when he needs to lean on her and remembering to lean on him to remind him of his strength. It takes a “new independent woman” to understand that her degree, her bank account, and her goals should be used to help hold down her family, not to build herself up.  And it takes a smart woman to know when she needs to protect her man from the world – even if it’s for his own good.

My dad wasn’t perfect, but my mom found a way to always make him appear that way in our eyes.

If you’re a black man, especially, please weigh in on whether these tips are on point and what else you need on the regular. Yeah, that too. But also share some advice for Kanye and other young men trying to maneuver through this world as husbands, fathers, breadwinners, etc. You never know what words might help heal a heart, calm a soul …or avoid a lawsuit!

(Photo: AP)

 

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