Every time I see the kid on the Ikea commercial pedal his toy car into his mom’s new kitchen appliances and cabinets, I’m assured that the copywriters for that spot were childless. It’s just one of many TV ads that could get some unsuspecting 5-year-old banned from my house for good— probably by one of my sons.
There’s the one where the kids are writing on the walls and painting on the carpet to prove that Wash Off Crayola products don’t leave permanent stains. Yeah, well, children don’t know the difference between a Crayola brand product that wipes off with a warm sponge (and costs a whopping $50, I might add) and a box of generic crayons from the 99 Cent Store. Therefore it’s totally irresponsible to undo 150 years of good parental threats that still make me shudder at the thought of ever taking a writing utensil to a painted wall in the house.
A lot of other cringe-worthy commercials involve paper towels and disinfectants… a potty training candidate who misses the toilet, the middle-schooler and dad who test their volcano science project on the kitchen counter and the little girl who carries a hot bowl of soup across the room spilling it along the away while mom beams in the background, reminding us that Bounty is the Quicker Picker Upper.
But one single commercial that’s most likely to get a kid in terminal time out (this the only punishment I can admit to, but trust me, in real life, it would be much worse) is the Subaru ad that shows two little boys washing their dad’s car inside and out. In 30 seconds, the curly head kids in swim trunks spray water on the car while the windows are down, pour a blue chemical on the windshield and polish the dashboard with toothpaste. The first time I saw it, I had a second of hope when they’re startled when their father appears. But my heart sank when he smiles and tells them they’ve missed a spot. Yeah, right. What world is this where such disregard of someone’s property gets a pass? I know the point was that Subarus last so long that the car will someday belong to the little perpetrators, but could this inspire my boys to ruin my ride with suds one summer day?
This one hits a little close too home until I remember who’s running things at our house.
But for the sake of the rest of the young viewers, those commercials should run with a disclaimer that reads: “What you’re about to see was performed by child actors and should not, no, we take that back, BETTER not be imitated.”
Until that day, a verbal warning, or better yet, that “Mama, side-eyed glare” should suffice.
Are there any commercials that have this kind of effect on you? If so please share them.
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This Week’s Celebrity Instagrams (11/26-12/2)
30 photos Launch gallery
1. Little Legend and Puddy 😍😍😍😍
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2. "You on point Phife?" "all the time,Tip". 💥 #bannedfromnormal
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3. Vegan! The Impossible burger at Crossroads
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4. Lawrence #BeforeandAfterEpisodes 1-4: 184lbs 13% body fatEpisode 8: 196lbs 8% body fat S/O @coachdaveboxing with the works outs and @kildareriordan with the nutrition
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5. Jus haaaanngin out
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6. Meanwhile back at home in Atlanta GA someone mad they not on the 🛳. 😳
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7. No limits... Photo cred: Chris Bridges @ludacris
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8. new new
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9. Apparently my 260lbs is too much for the actual vines in the Hawaiian jungles to hold me without breaking and me falling hundreds of feet. So for safety purposes, I'm forced to swing thru #Jumanjj on wires strong enough to hold 12 adult buffaloes and 1 adult Rock. #OnSet #Jumanji #IronicallyIEatBuffaloDailyForLunch #MoreManThanNatureKnowsWhatToDoWith
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10. hey ma! 🎎#wcw 💙
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11. Surprise visit to our factories!!! #GoodAmerican #USA
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13. Peachy Keen 🔥✨⚡️
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14. If this don't look thankful I don't know what does. Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours. #UltraBlessed #24kMagic #SweetPotatoFly
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15. Late nights @nbcmarlon with the writers... we in here!!!
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16. There goes my baaaaaaaaabbbbyyyyy #QueenKingMagic!!! We're up to something! Ira BIG!!! Stay out our buisness -
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17. You want to win every game you play but when you come home to these faces... who cares. #ILoveYouGirls best part of my day, everyday!
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18. Steady,steady..... full size jenga.. "I got this one "???? Or do I ?
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19. Cornrows kind of day 😉@dontaysavoy2 you convinced me and I love. ❤️️
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20. #BrotherlyLove #tbt
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22. #basel #TeamLOVE @kingcombs
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23. Just introduced a special screening of @directher 's groundbreaking (must see) documentary @13thfilm with my brother @themichaelealy | @unitedblackout #blackoutblackfriday
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24. Me & Vanessa Williams giving #DuckLips #Pose on the set of #DaytimeDivas @vh1 - Coming Soon to a tv near you. Lol. - My make up done by @makeupsurgeon
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25. This picture just makes me wanna praise the Lord, you hear me!!!!!! Yes Lord brotha #TEDDYCAMPBELL What a #man !!! You are everything right on this picture husband ......... #gorgeous #stylish #classy #strong #masculine #king #sexy #debonair #gentlemenstyle And that #bible in your hand just seals the deal for me (probably cause i know that, that is what helped you become just as amazing as you look😘). While my heart and mind experiences the goodness of God at #church on Sundays, my eyes experiences the goodness of Teddy😍. Amen somebody🙌🏽. "Bless the Lord oh my soul and all that is within me bless his holy name" #myman #myhusband #goodman #blackman #dapperman #godlyman #goodfather #mybestfriend
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26. Yesterday was my mama's 53rd birthday!!!!! Got to celebrate with her all day. If this is what I have to look forward to I can't wait. Looking like a soft bucket a cocoa butter. Yaaaaaaaaaas! 😍😍😍 love you mommy!
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27. "Shout out to @PureAtlanta for getting the family right"....I'm loving this jogger. 😍😍
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28. This pic warms my heart ❤️ #myLogiebeans and aunt aunt umba @itowandabraxton 😘
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29. You will always be my baby😜. #HappyBirthdayReginae #mybaby18
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30. GC "Gods Child" Red on Red SweatSuit available now at www.MonicaApparel.com ... Take Your Crown wherever you go!! I'm pictured in a Medium... Go to the site now for other options ... cc: @trukernell
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