It’s a good thing I’m not a hypochondriac, and if you are, I suggest you pass on this blog.
Do you ever wonder what would have happened if our parents would have tried to use half the excuses that are used today to get out of work or school? They wouldn’t have, partly because they knew better, and partly because most of the excuses hadn’t been invented yet.
There’s a syndrome for everything these days and here are a few of the most bizarre ones:
Exploding Head Syndrome: a disorder that causes sufferers to hear loud explosion-like noises within their own heads—even when their teenage sons aren’t playing the video game “Call of Duty Black Ops.”
Foreign Accent Syndrome: a speech disorder that is a result of head trauma and causes people to change their speech patterns and sometimes sound like they’re speaking with an accent. This is NOT to be confused with what happened to Tina Turner when she moved from Nut Bush, Tennessee to the big city or Madonna after spending a week in Great Britain.
But my favorite syndrome, or the one I can relate to most is the Phantom Vibration Syndrome…and no, it isn’t what you think. PVS is actually the sensation and false belief that one can feel one’s mobile phone vibrating or hear it ringing, when in fact the telephone is not doing so.
Phantom Pocket Vibration Syndrome is very similar except; of course the device is, well…in your pocket.
According to a recent Psychology Today article, psychologist Dr. Michelle Drouin, a professor at Indiana University-Purdue University in Fort Wayne, Indiana, performed a study on undergrads and even though most of them didn’t consider these phantom phone vibrations bothersome, she says it’s still a problem. Constantly or even frequently wondering whether we’re getting messages from our phones unconsciously bothers the brain, she says.
I’m no doctor, but I know that incessant phone checking interrupts the train of thought, is distracting in meetings and rude at the dinner table. It’s also bad during sleep and even worse during sex.
The article’s author, Dr. Larry Rosen has written a book about how technology interrupts our lives called iDisorder. I haven’t read it yet, but I do have some things I think I can contribute like:
I Know You Got My Text Syndrome: that uneasy feeling you get when you’re certain enough time has elapsed for someone to respond to your text message.
Please Let Me Get Their Voicemail Syndrome: That fervent prayer that you won’t have to actually talk to the person you called.
You’re Really Not Going to Answer Syndrome: That humiliating feeling you get when you watch someone check their phone and not pick it up after they realize it’s you calling them.
The Um…I Was on Another Call Syndrome: That uncomfortable moment when someone catches you check your phone and not answer it when you realized it’s them calling.
Phone technology will continue to invade our lives but we can take some comfort in knowing that we aren’t suffering alone. If you have a communication device-related syndrome to add to the list, I’d love to hear it…wait…oh, sorry, I was checking my phone.
Also On Black America Web:
This Week’s Celebrity Instagrams (6/18-6/24)
25 photos Launch gallery
1. Me & the homie @jaleelwhite #RujohnFoundation Happy to be in Jamaica! Good times
1 of 25
2 of 25
3 of 25
4 of 25
5. Good Morning. Early day in Detroit! Making press rounds for @thebossnetwork's Ladies That Lead Tour. Thank you @traycemadre and @colourbynumbr for my glam.
5 of 25
6. POWER the best show on TV @djenvy, Queens we so big out here. #EFFENVODKA #FRIGO
6 of 25
7. They said u lost a step, wasn't explosive as once was, the best days was in the real view, questioned your drive, your leadership, your commitment, you don't have killer instinct, going back home is the worst mistake in your career, he got the coach fired, players traded, won't work between him and Kyrie, Him and Kev won't work, love your teammates to much, there's no way he can deliver a championship in his hometown, etc etc etc.... But guess what THATS NONE OF MY BUSINESS #StriveForGreatness #ThisOneIsForTheLand #PutSomeRespeckOnMyName Hahahaha!!! Yes sir
7 of 25
8. Oooooh weeee this man right here is responsible for at least three of our four babies!! #JOE ❤❤❤🎤 #rnb #king #voicelikebutter #ForPeetesSake
8 of 25
9. Hanging with my @abcnetwork family! @abcunclebuck tonite y'all check us out ! @anthonyanderson @traceeellisross
9 of 25
10. My broski ( @sayeedshahidi ) and I are on Top 5 Live on @go90 at 5 (which is super duper close)! Make sure to tune in :) #UncleBuck #Blackish
10 of 25
11. Lights out💤 #GoodNight
11 of 25
12. Late nights mornings
12 of 25
13. Ran into the lovely talented @siedahgarrett on this brutiful favvuz deh!
13 of 25
14. #halal #love #thedargans #kattwilliamsSHOW #mashallah when that Jennah piece HIT!! @sweetjennahcollection glasses by @baddieglamaccessories LIZ 😍 @dynamiteko top @dazzledmv and jeans @thevision414 and shoes: @louboutinworld
14 of 25
15. Big Hair and Optical Illusions #OceanDrive #MiamiLiving #coverparty
15 of 25
16. MAMA and THE SAVAGES ... ⚓️ #supportyourlocalgirlgang
16 of 25
17. From the bottom of my ❤️, thank you new followers & old! & hello fellow night owls! #grateful #racheltrue #naturalhair #curlyhair #curlygirl #healthyhair
17 of 25
18. I feel so grateful because I met these amazing young minds, visiting from Houston TX, during their college tour stop today at #usc.These students are ALL extraordinary and embody academic excellence so I'm humbled to have shared a few moments with them to applaud and celebrate their bright futures ahead! Thank you @EmergeFellows for inviting me to speak and blessing me with your love and attention this afternoon!
18 of 25
19. Happy Fathers Day Pops. U taught me how to be a man. Lessons of love, hard work & gratefulness. Sorry the fishing didn't stick. LOL. I Love U!
19 of 25
20. Sky Zone and Ice Cream! Best Fathers Day Ever!! Photo credit @mariahcarey
20 of 25
21. Look what finally came in the mail 😎 #mtvmovieawards2016 💥+🌽! #straightouttacompton
21 of 25
22. Claudia Jordan: ....
22 of 25
23. 'Member that time I almost knocked a bajillion dollar camera off the car? Really? Yeah, me neither! #Greenleaf Episode 2 comin atcha!
23 of 25
24. Full of love. #birthday #Cabo
24 of 25
25. Oh hey! Look who just joined Snapchat
25 of 25