So, how do you top off spending three weeks straight on the road with your co-workers, much of it on a bus with one bathroom? Hanging out at a strip club with a friend/date in NYC probably wasn’t the first answer that popped into your head. And it wasn’t on my bucket list either, but I’m no punk so when he told me that after dinner we were going to swing by some of the restaurants and clubs that his company provides security for – a strip club included – the dare was implied and I didn’t blink. In fact, I slid on my stilettos and skinny jeans and decided to approach the whole adventure as a social experiment.
I’ll wait a second to let all the judgment come my way. There’s more? All right, bring it on. Ok, I got it, thanks!
Now as I said, before, I’m no punk but really, the whole stripper thing doesn’t carry the stigma it once did. Not only do a lot of gyms offer stripper pole workout classes, but for $79 you can purchase a pole for in-home use. Yeah – I Googled it! Besides research says that only 14 percent of men go to strip clubs on a regular basis and more often than not, they take their female friends with them.
Now we already know when men frequent strip clubs, they are not there to see their wives or even their girlfriends; they’re there to escape. But I think in some cases, they are there to escape in a good way.
That’s not to say men don’t want some element of what they’re seeing on the stage in their bedrooms or hers. It is a little erotic and different to watch men watch women when it’s all out in the open. They’re not trying to do that weird side look that doesn’t fool anybody. And maybe that’s why maybe 30 percent of the clientele at the club we were at were females, some with their mates or dates, some there to meet single guys and some there to meet single women.
Going with a guy I’m not in a serious relationship with who has professional reasons for being there, was the only way I would initially consider going to a strip club. And even though I’ve never had any previous desire to go, I have to admit that after being there for a few minutes, I was intrigued. In fact, I felt a little guilty that I didn’t feel worse about being at a strip club.
So, I confess that the whole social experiment theory was originally just something I used to make myself feel better, but at some point it changed. It was like being a fly on the wall and having a chance to see a side of men and women that I wouldn’t normally see. I started wondering about the women that make taking their clothes off a career and the men that would possibly risk a relationship to watch them do it.
Yes, there was part of me who felt that the women dancing were being exploited and the people who patronize those types of clubs are indirectly contributing to all the negativity that goes along with that lifestyle — prostitution and drug abuse, not to mention the whole issue of objectifying women.
But if you’re not looking to go that deep, and to be honest, I really wasn’t, maybe we can admit that being a part of a man’s fantasy, checking out what he really likes, and him feeling you’re cool enough to share that part of life with him is not that bad. I know things can get a lot rougher or worse than what I saw, but that night, I saw men get the same type of satisfaction as a lot of women do when we hang out with our girls, especially when drinking is involved. For most, the music and the girls were more of a backdrop as they drank and talked to each other. I wouldn’t want any man I’m serious about to hang out at a strip club for any inordinate amount of time, or anywhere else for that matter.
But if he needs to be somewhere where he’s sure I won’t show up every once in awhile and see something different than he normally sees, I say go for it. Then bring it on home and make it rain!
Now, it still ain’t right but after my “social experiment” at least I can understand.
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This Week’s Celebrity Instagrams (10/15-10/21)
31 photos Launch gallery
1. Just a NY girl with BIG dreams....
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2. HAPPY CHILDREN=QUALITY PARENTING. We don't always see eye to eye on everything and that's normal. We're human beings. But we come together and do it right for what's important, the kids. We are not enemies, we are parents. And we are parents 1st. S/O to @monyettashaw for making Mason's bday memorable. S/O to @itscrystalsmith at home taking care of our other lil' Prince. ❤️❤️❤️ THIS IS WHAT CO-PARENTING LOOKS LIKE. #Blessed #Happy #AboveTheDrama #BiggerThanUs
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3. So happy to finally be able to share with you all that I’m the new Global Brand Ambassador for @Revlon! Follow my day on RevlonSnaps. Yay! Choose Love, Everybody! #RevlonXCiara #chooselove #ad
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4. Glam on point!!!@makeupbymotoko & @shaylinjoneshair #easybreezy @lifetimetv #beachesmovie #january2017 😘
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5. ✨True love ✨📸: @jessiemarrerophotography
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7. Today was not easy..but by the grace of God we all got through it. Words cannot express our gratitude for all of your Prayers, Positive thoughts and Support for us throughout the years. Tommy will be missed but most certainly never forgotten...And PLEASE don't ask "Where's Martin?.." he was there too...just not in this picture. Lol! God bless you all.. #LoveConquersAll #MartinShow
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9. West coast get ready for #RockyHorror. I will be live tweeting again. #letsdothetimewarpagain
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10. #THEKEYS pre order yours now ... Available everywhere #NOV22 #WeTheBest 🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑🔑
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11. We about to ROCK at #KCABlackBall!! All for our life-changing effort to end 🌎 AIDS.
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12. Today's #SNAPJACK is brought to you by @yazzthegreatest 😂😂😂💋💋💋
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13. Damn girl you kinda old to be headed to the Go Go. You coming in at the age they leaving. LMAO
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14. Daddy daycare B-Boxin with @acewellstucker @shopraisingace
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15. #FBF Naviyd & URV "LIL MONSTERS"
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16. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ONE OF THE BIGGEST LEGENDS IN OUR HIPHOP HISTORY! @snoopdogg CONTINUED BLESSING AND LOVE FAMILY!!!!! REAL OG!
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17. Thank you for a beautiful night VSU! Let's do it again! #HOMECOMING
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18. Had a great time this morning with my familia Erica, Griff & Truth!!
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19. Check out my interview on @essence facebook live. #inmyownwords #nycpromo #day2
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20. #She💋 #tbt #TheCoveAtTheAtlantis #DawgPawsAndAll
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21. Bae #retailtherapy
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22. Why me and @coryhardrict got the same pose... and notee... new mouth #naked
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23. When my husband is my personal 'hype-man'! it kills me every time! 💜😂 #WHATNOW #lostfiles📷
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24. Diggy Simmons
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25. Hand full of @jacquieaiche 💙💎💍 @esnail_la 💅🏾
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26. SuperSoulers! You can watch my interview with Carl Lentz live from my Facebook page, tomorrow at 11a ET| 8a PT. #SuperSoulSunday
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27. 💋 .. When the friendship is easy like Sunday morning. ☀️
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28. Sunday mornings are the best........... hugs and cuddles with my angel
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29. #huggar16 #hellohuggars
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30. My gym is everywhere!.. #RnBMoney #TheGeneral 📸: @twelvepastseven
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31. Nothing I would rather be doing... Rocko setting up our movie, Romelō working on a puzzle & Laiyah singing and sharing all she's learning at school... I'm so grateful for the joy they've brought into my life ... Praying for peace , joy & love in the home of EVERY family ♥️ #HeadScarfPJSunday LOL 😂
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