Michael Jackson’s “This Is It,” to me, was extremely well done. This movie, which captured the spirit of Jackson’s rehearsal process for his final tour, gave us a glimpse into the last days of the artist, performer and superstar. But when he was rehearsing, he had no idea that this really was it – and very shortly thereafter, his life was over.
Have you ever felt that way – that the job, the relationship, the home, the status, the car or whatever it was you wanted, once attained, ended too soon or never lived up to your expectations, thus forcing you to ask, is that it?
How many of us have worked really hard to get a position, only to find out that what we dreamed of wasn’t all we hoped for? What about in a relationship? We can work for years to build a relationship. You invest your heart, mind and spirit into something that you hope will last forever. Then when the relationship ends, sometimes you wonder what all of that effort was for. Is that it?
I’m amazed at how one day you feel like a person is your world, and then, at some point, when things deteriorate, you are looking at them like a stranger – and vice versa.
What about the American dream we all seek – the house, the car, the money? Personally, I certainly have not achieved everything that my heart desires, but I have been blessed. I know what it’s like to have loved and lost. I know what it’s like to be ambitious and get what you thought you wanted, only to realize it wasn’t fulfilling.
Early this year, I purchased a home. Like with many home purchases, especially these days, I jumped through many hoops to get it, and the good news is that I did. But sometimes I feel like my ambition gets in the way of me enjoying life. I say this because once one thing is attained, I immediately move on to the next phase, which means I don’t take enough time to enjoy the now.
For instance, now I’m in the house – and it’s just me. There are so many improvements I want to make, but I don’t have the time or resources to do it at the level or pace that I want. Still, on a larger note, I’m home alone, and in the words of Luther, a house is not a home if there’s no one there …
Now, don’t get me wrong; I know there are many people who wish they could purchase a home and live there all by themselves, with no one bothering them – no kids, no spouse, no dog. I have every intention of enjoying this phase of my life, where I get to have my privacy and do what I want when I want. But truthfully, now that I have the house, I often find myself thinking, Is this it?
We all think the grass is greener on the other side, don’t we?
The point is I’m trying to learn to better appreciate every opportunity that life brings me, but ultimately, accomplishment resonates the deepest when you have someone special to share it with. So while I’m confident that I’m a sexy, spiritual and successful sister – and I worked very hard to get here – for me, this can’t be it. I’m still hungry, I want more. And I want a family of my own to share it all with.
Since we never know when our “this is it” moment will present itself, let’s value