Yesterday, our In Studio Jam guest Ginuwine sung his now-classic hit, “In those Jeans.” J. immediately murdered it (in record time, I might add), and turned it into a song about too tight jeans. And even though he was late for work yesterday, as usual, his comedy was right on time. Today there’s a story in the news about the harm that can be caused by “skinny jeans” worn too tight. We’re leaving that part of the story to the experts, but we want to talk about how harmful it is to SEE someone wearing jeans … or anything else that is just too dang tight.
Most of us have been perpetrators of this crime at one time or another, but some of y’all just won’t give it a break. Here’s the rule: If your clothes hurt you to wear them, they hurt those of us who have to watch you walk around in them. And it isn’t like you don’t know they’re too tight. So let’s go over why you might wear them anyway.
Nothing else is clean. If this is the case, take a sick day. Just call your boss and say, “You’re in a tight spot.” He or she will understand. Another excuse is that you think they will loosen up as the day goes by. That’s a big lie. If anything, they’ll get tighter — especially after you have those two donuts in the morning. By lunchtime, you will need to be cut out of them. There are times when we lose a little weight and try to get back into something a size or two smaller before it’s time. When you think you might be ready, 99 percent of the time you aren’t. Give it another six months. Finally, sometimes we just hope that others won’t notice that our clothes are too tight. That never happens. In fact, if you’re a serial tight-clothes wearer, people are waiting for you to get off the elevator just so they can see how tight your clothes are going to be.
If you feel that air between those buttons on your shirt, people can see your skin. If you have more meat than material on your pants and manage to squeeze it all in, it doesn’t stay there; it rises to the top. If your pants have pockets on the sides, and you can’t put your hands in them — or the pockets have moved so far away from each other that they’re in different area codes, people can see that.
I’m saying all this because I love you. Which brings me to today’s “For Real, For Real” poll. It’s about telling people close to us that their look is jacked up. Have you had to do it? Has it been done to you? Or is it that friends don’t let friends go out of the house looking like a fool? Write me, call me, or text me at OhOhOh (646464), and tell me what you think.
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This Week’s Celebrity Instagrams (6/18-6/24)
25 photos Launch gallery
1. Me & the homie @jaleelwhite #RujohnFoundation Happy to be in Jamaica! Good times
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5. Good Morning. Early day in Detroit! Making press rounds for @thebossnetwork's Ladies That Lead Tour. Thank you @traycemadre and @colourbynumbr for my glam.
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6. POWER the best show on TV @djenvy, Queens we so big out here. #EFFENVODKA #FRIGO
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7. They said u lost a step, wasn't explosive as once was, the best days was in the real view, questioned your drive, your leadership, your commitment, you don't have killer instinct, going back home is the worst mistake in your career, he got the coach fired, players traded, won't work between him and Kyrie, Him and Kev won't work, love your teammates to much, there's no way he can deliver a championship in his hometown, etc etc etc.... But guess what THATS NONE OF MY BUSINESS #StriveForGreatness #ThisOneIsForTheLand #PutSomeRespeckOnMyName Hahahaha!!! Yes sir
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8. Oooooh weeee this man right here is responsible for at least three of our four babies!! #JOE ❤❤❤🎤 #rnb #king #voicelikebutter #ForPeetesSake
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9. Hanging with my @abcnetwork family! @abcunclebuck tonite y'all check us out ! @anthonyanderson @traceeellisross
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10. My broski ( @sayeedshahidi ) and I are on Top 5 Live on @go90 at 5 (which is super duper close)! Make sure to tune in :) #UncleBuck #Blackish
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11. Lights out💤 #GoodNight
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12. Late nights mornings
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13. Ran into the lovely talented @siedahgarrett on this brutiful favvuz deh!
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14. #halal #love #thedargans #kattwilliamsSHOW #mashallah when that Jennah piece HIT!! @sweetjennahcollection glasses by @baddieglamaccessories LIZ 😍 @dynamiteko top @dazzledmv and jeans @thevision414 and shoes: @louboutinworld
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15. Big Hair and Optical Illusions #OceanDrive #MiamiLiving #coverparty
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16. MAMA and THE SAVAGES ... ⚓️ #supportyourlocalgirlgang
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17. From the bottom of my ❤️, thank you new followers & old! & hello fellow night owls! #grateful #racheltrue #naturalhair #curlyhair #curlygirl #healthyhair
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18. I feel so grateful because I met these amazing young minds, visiting from Houston TX, during their college tour stop today at #usc.These students are ALL extraordinary and embody academic excellence so I'm humbled to have shared a few moments with them to applaud and celebrate their bright futures ahead! Thank you @EmergeFellows for inviting me to speak and blessing me with your love and attention this afternoon!
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19. Happy Fathers Day Pops. U taught me how to be a man. Lessons of love, hard work & gratefulness. Sorry the fishing didn't stick. LOL. I Love U!
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20. Sky Zone and Ice Cream! Best Fathers Day Ever!! Photo credit @mariahcarey
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21. Look what finally came in the mail 😎 #mtvmovieawards2016 💥+🌽! #straightouttacompton
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22. Claudia Jordan: ....
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23. 'Member that time I almost knocked a bajillion dollar camera off the car? Really? Yeah, me neither! #Greenleaf Episode 2 comin atcha!
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24. Full of love. #birthday #Cabo
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25. Oh hey! Look who just joined Snapchat
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